Time Moves Slowly........

It's now the morning after I'm told I have Stage 4 Lung Cancer. I am laying in Mom's bed crying harder than I have ever cried in my life. This was also the morning of the movie theater shooting in Colorado. The news was on and as I was trying to listen to this devastation, I stopped crying. I thought to myself that the innocent people in that shooting didn't have a chance to say good bye to loved ones nor did they even realize those were their last seconds. I had that opportunity and my heart stopped breaking for me and started breaking for those people. I gathered myself enough to shower and mom ran me into town to see my dad. I hadn't seen him for a few days, so when I finally did I gave him a hug and told him that I was scared. Never in my entire life have I ever heard my dad say, "I'm scared too, this isn't supposed to happen to my baby." I honestly have no idea how I got through the rest of that day. All I remember is laying back down at night still at mom's house and I needed that Bible I had the night before. Again, I placed it on my chest and again, I felt some sense of comfort.
The next day, Sunday, my sister came over to mom's because she was getting ready to leave on a cruise. I made her go on that cruise. She didn't want to leave, but she deserved to go and I wasn't going to die in a week, so she went. I had the pleasure of watching my two nephews for that week and thank goodness because they kept me busy and my mind off of things. But, that week ended and before I knew it, we were meeting with the lung surgeon. I was really nervous to meet with this guy because my oncologist said he would be the most difficult one to get to agree to remove the tumor. Generally, in cases such as mine they don't remove the tumors because it doesn't prolong anything. Also, generally speaking cases such as mine happen to 70/80 year olds, not 33 year olds and hearing the word prolong, really disturbed me. So, here we are waiting for the lung surgeon and I have an incredible amount of people there to support me from my boss, school board president, my aunt and uncle, a co-worker, my mom's best friend, and the list goes on. But, there is one person other than my family of course, that really made this ordeal easier. She has been through 4 cancers, one being lung. Talk about a miracle! She really guided us through everything.....
Back to the surgeon, he finally comes in and pulls up my scans and biopsy results. I never looked at my scans, quite frankly, I didn't want to see what my body was infected with. So, instead I turn and look at Angie, this was her first time looking as well and the look on her face really shocked and confused me. It was like she lost her best friend! I decided to turn and look at my scans and what I saw about dropped me. There were masses all over my body!!! But, that wasn't my body............